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Comdira
The Observatory
Exercise11 minSocialRationality

The anatomy of jealousy

Jealousy is seldom what it claims to be. Take it apart, and choose a response that doesn't damage what it wants to protect.

The path

How it works

  1. What it's made ofWriteChoose
  2. The testWriteRate
  3. The responseWrite
Jealousy is an alloy: fear of loss, wounded pride, comparison, and sometimes real information. The parts call for different responses, which is why they have to be separated.

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The evidence

Why does it work?

The division into reactive and suspicious jealousy is established in the research (Buunk; White & Mullen), as is the link between low self-esteem or anxious attachment and jealousy. That monitoring and controlling behaviors make things worse rather than calming them is well documented; openly communicating the feeling as a need is the clinically recommended route. The exercise format is clinically informed.

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